A lot of times I wonder "How bad can a movie get?". Somehow, I always find a movie that answers this question with "That bad". 2011 has been full of these movies, and surprisingly too many. I'm not actually sure why I have seen all these movies, since all but maybe four or five of them were obviously bad from just the premise, previews, and previous installments. Let's remember that I haven't seen every movie out there, so if it's missing from the list, then feel free to mention it in the comments section. It's that I thought it was any good, but I just didn't see it. I've broken this post into 3 categories: the Bubble List (not horrible, just bad movies made throughout the year), Dishonorable Mentions(barely made the top 10), and the top 10 worst movies.
Bubble List
Hall Pass- Two married guys who have been given a whole week to do whatever they want without punishment. Of course, from the first preview I saw of this, I could predict how it ended, and guess what? I was spot on.
J.Edgar- As an early Oscar contender, this is my pick of the years 'Biggest Disappointment". How can a film starring Leonardo DiCaprio and directed by Clint Eastwood be on your list, you may ask. Short answer is: I wanted to walk out, and Leo's performance was cringeworthy. I still think Leo is a great actor, but this has to be one of the weakest roles in his career.
Your Highness- Ah, stoner comedies. Danny McBride and James Franco's previous one, "Pineapple Express" had me on the floor laughing for a good 15 minutes at one point. So, I naturally came into this hoping for the same effect. A few chuckles, and a questionable plot, doesn't cut it for me.
The Rite- Can Hollywood move on already with the exorcism movies? Just because they made one good exorcism film way back in the 80's, and haven't made any good horrors since, they've decided to revisit this topic over 7 times in the last three years. That's a waste of money, which could have been spent on MUCH better projects, but was pissed away on this boring subject. They're all the same. Not to mention that there are 2 more being produced at the moment.
New Years Eve- I honestly don't know why I saw this movie. The first one, "Valentines Day" was absolutely horrible, and ended up as my second worst movie of last year. By no means was this a "good" film. In fact, it was pretty bad. Just an excuse to put 30 famous actors all in the same movie for 10 minutes a piece, hoping that everybody reading the cast list will like at least one of them and decide to give this film a chance. I don't know what it was, maybe New Years Eve is just a better holiday than Valentines Day, but I enjoyed this one just enough better to not put it on my Top 10.
Dishonorable Mentions
The Roommate- I don't know why this movie isn't on the Top 10, but something kept me from putting it there. Was it the fact that Minka Kelly is super hot? Maybe, but nonetheless, this is a horrible film, that insults anyone who watches it.
Arthur-Ouch, Warner Brothers really thought they had this film in the bag. Remaking a two time Oscar winning film from the 80's, who wouldn't spend time and money on it. Question is, who did see this train-wreck. I love Russell Brand, but this is the last kind of movie I could have envisioned him making. So limited, organized, and the wrong kind of immature.
Battle L.A.- Aaron Eckhart really needs to find a film to work on, or else more films like this and "Love Happens" will happen. Whatever the hell was going on, I didn't care because the plot holes in this film were so numerous, that I just played Angry Birds throughout 45 minutes of it.
Water for Elephants- This actually sounded like a somewhat appealing film to me. I hate the Twilight Saga, but Robert Pattinson is one of the more likable young actors in Hollywood. And the whole circus scene in the 20's, gave it a Moulin Rouge feel. Add in Christoph Waltz and Reese Witherspoon, I couldn't miss this one. Unfortunately, it wasn't executed to perfection, and focused on the wrong themes and subjects. Had it been the same setting, but changed up the story a bit to make it more buzzworthy, then it could have been worth my time.
Alvin and the Chipmunks 3-This was another film that I couldn't believe I actually saw. The first one was cute, the second one was pathetic, and this one was pitiful. It barely makes the Top 10 because it's short, somewhat eye appealing, and I sat through it without checking my wach for the time. But if I have to sit through those annoying falsettos and preposterous stories one more time, it'll be at the Top of my Top 10. I think it's time for Fox 2000 to axe this series.
Top 10 Worst Movies of 2011.
10. Footloose
Okay, so nobody actually thought that this could be any good, but WOW. Even though it's basically a shot-for-shot remake of the 1981 classic, it manages to make these characters seem even more annoying and unrealistic than we would have imagined them. No wonder first Zac Efron, then Chace Crawford called quits for the main role and was given to a basically nobody.
9. Season of the Witch
7. Drive Angry
Congratulations Nicolas Cage, you did it. You made two shitty films released within less than a MONTH of each other. This one though, was so bad. So so so so so so so so bad. I can't believe they even made this hokey dokey script into a feature length movie, not to mention in 3D. What was Millenium thinking? Whatever it was, I'm never going to sit through this one again.
6. Sanctum
I came into this movie being sure of what I was going to get. A weak script that's just passable enough to be turned into a movie so that we can be shown beautiful shots of some majestic underground place somewhere on Earth. I would have accepted that, nay, preferred that. But instead, we get a movie, that tries and pushes so hard for us to believe that it's characters are real and act like real people. And the funny thing is that they don't! This movie could have been few on words, and just an adventure, but instead, it thought that it would be taken more seriously had it *SPOILER ALERT* killed off basically every character.
5. Just Go With It
If you can remember a time, when an Adam Sandler film came out and everyone went out to see it, because they knew that it would be just so damn funny. Well it's amazing how much things can change in a mere 10-15 years. I was lucky enough to skip out on this one way back when it came out in theaters. But then, a family member brought it over, and I had to sit through it. I almost made a whole year without seeing a new Sandler film, and oh how happy I would have been if that were the case. Sandler needs to stop making these kinds of films and revisit his classics so that he can see what formula actually works for a successful film.
4.Transformers: Dark of the Moon
It's like Michael Bay has a panic button. Whenever he something is going wrong in one of his movies and panics, he can press this button and that problem seemingly goes away. Unfortunately, like everything in life, pressing this button has consequences. In this case, every time he presses his button, an explosion happens on the set of his film. For every plot hole in this film, we get an explosion, or a giant thing crashing. This script must have been written in a day, a short day for that. From the acting, to the script, to the music, the whole Transformers franchise is just an excuse to get a whole bunch of good looking people around loud and deadly explosions. I think it's time to let this franchise go, and never look back.
3. Breaking Dawn
It's pretty clear to all of America, that the Twilight franchises only point is to get a whole bunch of muscly guys to rip off their shirts. I can't argue with a good business module, because as sad as it is to say it, it works. People go to see these movies. Now, I'm not like most people and just hate Twilight to hate it. This was just a particularly bad installment. The first one was decent, watchable, and didn't solely rely on shirtless dudes, while the third one had a pretty cool premise and unity to it and if they took out some of the audience grabbers, then it could have been a really solid film. But how low does a franchise have to go, if it has a whole 15 minutes of wolves talking through voice over. It wasn't even executed well enough, "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" did a better job with talking dogs.
2. Sucker Punch
"Sucker Punch" is like Twilight for men. It's a whole bunch of young, hot, slutty chicks. The only difference, is that "Sucker Punch" is even more ungrounded than Twilight, that you couldn't believe for a second that in any universe somebody would do some of the things these characters do. Yeah I know that it's important to remember that this girl is freaking insane, but seriously? Come on Snyder.
1. Country Strong
I went back and forth between this, and a few other ones, but when it came down to it, this has to be the worst movie of 2011. Never mind the fact that it has an Oscar nomination from earlier this year for song writing, because I will admit that it has a few nice tunes including "Coming Home" and "Country Strong", but good songs don't make up a film. The Beach Boys singing "Kokomo" didn't make "Cocktail" a good movie at all. This film is so uncomfortable to sit through, but that would have been okay had it offered some brilliance in one way or another. But it didn't, just some bad acting, by what otherwise would be a pretty decent cast. People applaud it for dealing with such touchy subjects like addiction, and I would too, had it had anything to do with making these characters more likable and more real. This film was such a mess, that it deserves to be crowned as the worst film of 2011.
J.Edgar- As an early Oscar contender, this is my pick of the years 'Biggest Disappointment". How can a film starring Leonardo DiCaprio and directed by Clint Eastwood be on your list, you may ask. Short answer is: I wanted to walk out, and Leo's performance was cringeworthy. I still think Leo is a great actor, but this has to be one of the weakest roles in his career.
Your Highness- Ah, stoner comedies. Danny McBride and James Franco's previous one, "Pineapple Express" had me on the floor laughing for a good 15 minutes at one point. So, I naturally came into this hoping for the same effect. A few chuckles, and a questionable plot, doesn't cut it for me.
The Rite- Can Hollywood move on already with the exorcism movies? Just because they made one good exorcism film way back in the 80's, and haven't made any good horrors since, they've decided to revisit this topic over 7 times in the last three years. That's a waste of money, which could have been spent on MUCH better projects, but was pissed away on this boring subject. They're all the same. Not to mention that there are 2 more being produced at the moment.
New Years Eve- I honestly don't know why I saw this movie. The first one, "Valentines Day" was absolutely horrible, and ended up as my second worst movie of last year. By no means was this a "good" film. In fact, it was pretty bad. Just an excuse to put 30 famous actors all in the same movie for 10 minutes a piece, hoping that everybody reading the cast list will like at least one of them and decide to give this film a chance. I don't know what it was, maybe New Years Eve is just a better holiday than Valentines Day, but I enjoyed this one just enough better to not put it on my Top 10.
Dishonorable Mentions
The Roommate- I don't know why this movie isn't on the Top 10, but something kept me from putting it there. Was it the fact that Minka Kelly is super hot? Maybe, but nonetheless, this is a horrible film, that insults anyone who watches it.
Arthur-Ouch, Warner Brothers really thought they had this film in the bag. Remaking a two time Oscar winning film from the 80's, who wouldn't spend time and money on it. Question is, who did see this train-wreck. I love Russell Brand, but this is the last kind of movie I could have envisioned him making. So limited, organized, and the wrong kind of immature.
Battle L.A.- Aaron Eckhart really needs to find a film to work on, or else more films like this and "Love Happens" will happen. Whatever the hell was going on, I didn't care because the plot holes in this film were so numerous, that I just played Angry Birds throughout 45 minutes of it.
Water for Elephants- This actually sounded like a somewhat appealing film to me. I hate the Twilight Saga, but Robert Pattinson is one of the more likable young actors in Hollywood. And the whole circus scene in the 20's, gave it a Moulin Rouge feel. Add in Christoph Waltz and Reese Witherspoon, I couldn't miss this one. Unfortunately, it wasn't executed to perfection, and focused on the wrong themes and subjects. Had it been the same setting, but changed up the story a bit to make it more buzzworthy, then it could have been worth my time.
Alvin and the Chipmunks 3-This was another film that I couldn't believe I actually saw. The first one was cute, the second one was pathetic, and this one was pitiful. It barely makes the Top 10 because it's short, somewhat eye appealing, and I sat through it without checking my wach for the time. But if I have to sit through those annoying falsettos and preposterous stories one more time, it'll be at the Top of my Top 10. I think it's time for Fox 2000 to axe this series.
Top 10 Worst Movies of 2011.
10. Footloose
9. Season of the Witch
Okay, so uhm, I have no idea where to begin with this description. First of all, I haven't seen this since January, so I barely remember the details of this horribly executed excuse of a movie. I just know that when I did see it, I hated it. Nicolas Cage continues his schtick of 'Saving the World', and I am honestly so sick of it.
8. Something Borrowed
I can warn you now, that this year, unlike every other year, there are barely any Rom-Coms on this list. It's not that they have necessarily gotten better this year, it's more so that they have stopped producing them. I guess Hollywood figured out that no one likes them, and cut down the amount of them produced this year. Whatever it may be, this movie was so unbearably insulting, that the only things that kept me in the theater, were the beautiful beach house shots, and John Krasinskis universal down to earthness.
6. Sanctum
I came into this movie being sure of what I was going to get. A weak script that's just passable enough to be turned into a movie so that we can be shown beautiful shots of some majestic underground place somewhere on Earth. I would have accepted that, nay, preferred that. But instead, we get a movie, that tries and pushes so hard for us to believe that it's characters are real and act like real people. And the funny thing is that they don't! This movie could have been few on words, and just an adventure, but instead, it thought that it would be taken more seriously had it *SPOILER ALERT* killed off basically every character.
5. Just Go With It
If you can remember a time, when an Adam Sandler film came out and everyone went out to see it, because they knew that it would be just so damn funny. Well it's amazing how much things can change in a mere 10-15 years. I was lucky enough to skip out on this one way back when it came out in theaters. But then, a family member brought it over, and I had to sit through it. I almost made a whole year without seeing a new Sandler film, and oh how happy I would have been if that were the case. Sandler needs to stop making these kinds of films and revisit his classics so that he can see what formula actually works for a successful film.
4.Transformers: Dark of the Moon
3. Breaking Dawn
2. Sucker Punch
"Sucker Punch" is like Twilight for men. It's a whole bunch of young, hot, slutty chicks. The only difference, is that "Sucker Punch" is even more ungrounded than Twilight, that you couldn't believe for a second that in any universe somebody would do some of the things these characters do. Yeah I know that it's important to remember that this girl is freaking insane, but seriously? Come on Snyder.
1. Country Strong
